What labels someone as a stay-at-home mom?
Are you a stay-at-home mom if you are also acting as a teacher while homeschooling your children? Can you call your self a teacher when you're doing the same job - just unpaid - that someone in a school setting would be doing?
Are you a stay-at-home mom if you spend numerous hours fulfilling volunteer work that helps fulfill an organization's mission? What if you serve - unpaid - on a board of directors? What if your ability to volunteer your time uses the education and training you received prior to becoming a mom but is now simply unpaid?
Are you a stay-at-home mom when you are doing the jobs and functions of an employee - cleaning house, cooking meals, doing laundry, etc.? Yes, these may be menial tasks, but what if they replace the job that someone else could be getting paid to do?
Are you a stay-at-home mom when you do anything but stay at home during the day in order to get children to school, extracurricular activities, run errands, and more?
Why do we feel the need to label someone as a stay-at-home mom?
I believe a woman/man who choses to stay home and raise her/his children can call themself anything they are comfortable with. The question to me is not what the world thinks or wants to call her but, is this the best for the entire family and does her spouse agree. It is the most difficult but, most important job any woman/man will ever have. It is also, many times, the most thankless until said children are raised. I believe it takes a highly intelligent, motivated, confident and committed woman/ man to raise well adjusted, kind, loving, responsible and confident children who don't believe the world is in place to cater to them or, that they are the center of it. No company board or room of people will stand up and cheer for you doing a great job or recognize you, as they might it you worked in corporate America. However, when those children come home and tell you they are thankful for the way you raised them and the time and energy you took to do it your reward will be more than you can imagine. When you watch them go forward and live life as kind, loving adults who put others before themselves and are successful in their choices, you will have no doubt it was the right choice for you. If this is not your choice, that is just fine also. The great thing about this country is that you still have the freedom to make that choice and decide what will work for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI think it's unfortunate that the phrase 'stay-at-home mom' has a negative connotation connected with it. The contributions stay-at-home moms make to family and community are huge and often overlooked. The title doesn't come close to capturing what a stay-at-home mom really does, but I've never figured out a better phrase. Ultimately, I guess it doesn't matter what the title is. Those of us 'at-home' can hopefully find whatever validation/approval/respect we need from ourselves and our families.
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